Left To Right

.violent unusually are left to right read who people seems It

The Financial System Is Rotten

The financial system is rife with fraud and embezzlement. How can you have a squeaky clean government under these conditions?

You can't.

Too bad all the investigative journalists have been Raptured.

Something Funny

It's funny. You can go and see the original US Constitution; the original document, and read it in English. However, there are divisions and schools of thought over what it means. Yet, the Bible has no original documents and people claim to know exactly what it says.

That's funny.

I Drew An X

As you can see, the closer we move to an oligarchy, the more fawning the media becomes to the power structure.

Isn't that interesting?

I Beg Your Pardon

	A cynic would say the last thing you heard.
	- Dr. E. Havard Roach

Whackjobs And Wingnuts

	"Jentili, what did you think of that last person on TV?" "I'm afraid Sir, he was a whackjob." "You mean a wingnut Jentili?" "I confess Sir, I don’t know the difference." "Let me explain Jentili: a wingnut is simply quietly insane. Think of a fundamentalist Christian as an example. A whackjob, is a wingnut who has resolved that violence against those he opposes is justified." "So a whackjob is a violent, armed wingnut?" "Exactly Jentili." "Do they have to be religious Sir?" "Jentili, how else is the leader going to finance the private jet, or the mansion, or the hookers?" "You forgot the drugs Sir." "No Jentili, they're right here."
	- excerpt from one of Matt's conversations

Another Day At The Office

"Dear Jesus, your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter..."

A Million Monkeys

Could a million monkeys, each typing all day long, produce a perfect copy of the original source documents of the Bible?

Could a second million monkeys, each searching all day long, find the original source documents of the Bible - so we could tell if the work of the first million monkeys was accurate?

Conspiracy Theories Are Real

	Conspiracy theories are self replicating. Every conspiracy theory generates a spin-off as soon as someone disbelieves it. The disbelief generates a child conspiracy theory to explain the unsatisfactory parent conspiracy theory. Conspiracy theories are real, just like stock certificates are real. There is a supply of them. There is a market for them. Someone should bring the market theory of supply and demand to this phenomenon and analyze it in terms of a market 'bubble'. Excessive State secrecy generates conspiracy theories because no truth or clarification is available. Will this market have a top?
	- Nigel Thint

Net Brain Syndrome

	As our internet use increases, our attention span shortens. This results in increasing shallowness of field. This in turn, leads to evolutionary changes where our brains assume the shape of our perceptual habits. We shall become flatheads or pancakeoids. I propose the term: 'internetencephalitis'. I think you've seen enough now.
	- Prof. Ferris White

Deconstructing Hubris

	I have begun to encounter the word 'hubris' too often. Hubris is too polite a term to describe what it is being used for. The appropriate term is stupidity. Total, blanket, full-spectrum stupidity.
	- Dr. G. Paul Fredericks

Where Was Jesus Kidding?

	So Jesus was a man right?  A fully functioning, normal man.  He laughed, cried, had friends?  That means he spoke in a regular way and therefore used irony, humor and sarcasm. So, open the Bible then, and tell me where he was kidding.
	- Rev. H. Lucas Thinn (Ret.)

Class Assignment

	Prove, using only original source documents, that the Bible is not a collection of lentil soup recipes.
	- Rev. H. Lucas Thinn (Ret.)

Internet Damaged Brain Syndrome

	The technology we use to access the internet, changes us through its use. The internet effect: the devices or technology we use to access the internet turns us into quasi-copies of those same devices.   I notice it. My intellectual depth of field has been reduced. It is time related. I don't want to spend the time to read an entire article. I scan for important things - things that strike my fancy or appeal to my sense of quality at the moment. I am being led to evaluate articles on the basis of length or quantity instead of quality. I do no study. If deep thinking or study is equal to deep reading, then my internet activities are reducing my mental capacity for intelligence. The more time I spend on the internet, the more shallow I become. I'm in up to my ankles about now.
	- Nigel Thint

Scientists Capture First Image Of The Blogosphere

Scientists working at the Institute of Research have captured the first raw image of the blogosphere, a bit of the internet.

Project leader Dr. Paulo S. Lackadaisicali, told Matt Mental: "I thought it looked like an egg, but then I changed my mind."

Where is God?

	God is incarcerated in a leather bound, gold-edged prison.
	- Rev. H. Lucas Thinn (Ret.)

Global War On Lunch

	If Bin Laden and Ahmadinijhad were both in a restaurant, and Bin Laden said "pass the salt", the Americans would claim they were in secret talks.
	- Maury Blingberg

The United States Department of Silence

	What follows is the only surviving record of Matt Mental's interrupted interview with Justin Case, Secretary of The United States Department of Silence. Matt Mental: I'm speaking with Justin Case, Secretary of the United States Department of Silence. Thank you for your time Mr. Secretary. Justin Case: You're welcome, Matt. MM: I'd like to first ask you about the history of your department. How was it started? JC: Well Matt, that's classified. I'm sorry. MM: Not too worry. I understand these things. After all, you're here now, so let's just move along. Perhaps, Mr. Secretary, we might spend some time on the role of the Department of Silence in the government. JC: Yes, go on. MM: The ROLE, the function of the Department of Silence? JC: Well clearly Matt, the maintenance of good standards of silence is very important to us all. The Department of Silence is dedicated to upholding best practices in silence with the objective of keeping the United States first in the world in the implementation of silence. MM: Do you mean the ABSENSE of noise? JC: Not only the absence of noise Matt, but also the absence of openness, and the consolidation of a more secretive government with a more muted population. MM: That's a rather BOLD statement Mr. Secretary. JC: I'd rather not comment on that. MM: But you JUST said it. You mean you won't comment on what you just said? JC: That's right. MM: Well then, what's the point of talking to you? JC: I could have you arrested, you little tit. MM: Excuse me, Mr. Secretary ... that's TEAT.

Regarding Politics

	Politicrat: A platitude reciting, propaganda throwing tool; a ruling class widget who produces nothing of value. Mediacrat: A platitude copying, propaganda echoing tool; a ruling class widget who produces nothing of value. Voter: A bystander; a subwidget. Radical: An angry subwidget. Insurgent: A motivated radical; a nonwidget.
	- Louis Mott

The Government

I'm currently compiling a list of laws in the United States that are not being enforced, and I shall continue to compile it until they are. 

-- Dr. Peter Frith